Ace on the Face But Don’t Get it in My Hair! - 4 Semen Secrets

Though sperm is mainly used for procreation, it can have other benefits to everyday life.

Because You’re Worth it!

In sperm, a crystalline polyamine compound called Spermine can be found. This particular compound is also known as an antioxidant. It is believed to diminish wrinkles, smooth skin and help with taming or preventing acne. A Norwegian company, has synthesised the compounds into a facial cream. According to research, the cream Spermine is 30 times more effective than vitamin E and can delay the ageing process by 20 percent. However, nature's most natural facial cream can cost you a whopping $250.

Give Yourself a Boost

Not only can sperm provide healthy skin, but also it can be used as an anti-depressant. In a recent study, researchers demonstrated that women who were directly exposed to semen were less likely to be depressed. The study stated mood-altering hormones that are present in semen can be absorbed through the vagina. Some of these mood-altering chemicals include, but are not limited to prolactin, a natural anti-depressant; oxytocin, which assist in enhancing one's mood and serotonin, a widely known antidepressant neurotransmitter.

Erm….Tasty!

When it comes to cooking, although semen may be the farthest thing from your mind, according to "Natural Harvest—A Collection of Semen-Based Recipes," semen is very nutritious. The cook book advertises semen as an "inexpensive" ingredient that can give any food an…erm…“interesting twist.”

Cloak and Dagger

Lastly, if by any chance you are in dire need of invisible ink, semen may suffice. During World War I, the British Intelligence Service discovered semen can act as invisible ink. Unlike other chemicals used, semen did not react to means of detection such as iodine vapour.

Unless you are a part of an intelligence group of some kind, invisible ink may not be essential, however if you ever need a facial, Spermine may be a great option. If you don’t want to shell out the dough, perhaps just make it a part of your bedroom routine — after all, waste not, want not!

To Swing or Not to Swing - Overcoming the Green-Eyed Monster

Jealousy is an obvious issue that you and your partner need to address before you even begin swinging. Not dealing with this potential problem beforehand will certainly come back to bite you in the rear - and not in a fun way! If you are the incredibly jealous sort (particularly about sexual infidelity), swinging might not be your bag and you should not feel ashamed or upset that you become jealous about the emotional and sexual ties to your spouse or committed partner.

Almost everyone feels jealousy on some level, and those who are prone to jealousy need to stick to a monogamous relationship. In fact, monogamy (as long as affairs are excluded) is made to reduce or even get rid of jealousy since you will have complete and total access to the sexual and emotional aspects of your partner. On the other hand, if you have such a deep trust with your partner that you are above jealousy and desire to enhance your sexual experiences with each other by including additional partners, you might want to look into swinging.

While many people are turned on by the thought of imagining their partner having sex with someone else, the actual act of seeing it happen can turn people off. Even for those who have decided to take up swinging, the first time you see your partner with another it can be a little jarring despite the fact that you might not be “jealous” in your own terms. The best way to adjust to these early stages of swinging is to take things slowly.

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Lay down ground rules with your partner that you both can agree on and stick to them. It is very common for couples to begin with “soft swinging” (where the actual intercourse is kept strictly with your partner while other actions happen with others) and then possibly work up to fully open swinging. Still, many couples find that soft swinging works best for them and choose not to upgrade. Do not be afraid to back things down if you start to feel uncomfortable or extremely jealous.

Another key element of swinging is to talk about your jealousy if you have it. Grinning and bearing it is NOT a good way to handle things. Stuffing it down is yet another bad idea. Successful swinging is built on the concepts of trust and confidence in your committed relationship. This isn’t to say that you do not have trust or confidence if you feel jealous about your partner being with someone else. It just means that if you feel that you and your partner could benefit from the experience of swinging you need to make sure the trust and confidence is already there. If you think that swinging isn’t your scene, just enjoy the trust and confidence you have and be happy in knowing not all relationships are like yours.

It does help to still set up boundaries no matter what level of swinging you happen to be at. Being intimate with your committed partner is still a special experience and is one to be savoured. Having boundaries with those you choose to swing with will help keep things intimate with you and your partner so that the natural jealousy you feel will be sated with the knowledge that you still have special access to your partner.

Happy swinging :-)

5 CBT Methods that Will Have You Hanging on to Your Love Spuds

So, you've decided to grow a pair and give CBT a go? Well, now you have your mind set upon grabbing your genital tormenting aspirations by the balls, you are unlikely to be disappointed. A little flick can cause a LOT of pain, however there are many ways in which you can wreak havoc on your partner’s stick and giggleberries. Just take a look at a few of them below.

Sensation / Temperature Play

This is what begins to separate the men from the boys. Why not introduce some of this play to your titillating torment? You may wish to combine this with genital bondage or testicle cuffs so that your victim’s bits and pieces are super sensitive to every sadistic stroke. Try dripping some specialist wax onto those sensitive spots, running a Wartenberg wheel over some areas, or even try some tickle torture. Alternatively give your sub some cool sensations with ice, and cold metal objects placed on his manhood.

Genital Bondage

With some delicate weaves and knots, there is no reason CBT can’t be pretty! Not only does binding the balls heighten sensitivity, it also hinders orgasm, making it the perfect practice for the ultimate tease and denial. Once the twins are bound, the exposed areas will be tight and extremely sensitive. Mummification of the penis is a popular choice for making an erection an uncomfortable prospect. Be careful not to bind too tightly, you don’t want to damage that precious package permanently.

Ball Crushing

If this is your only ‘vice’ it’s certainly an enjoyable one to have! A ball crusher is a device designed to gradually squeeze the testicles with the turn of a screw or nut. It’s up to the dominant to decide how much pressure a sub is to endure. You can also use your foot to obtain a similar effect, whether bare, wearing army boots, (ooh er!) or even whilst wearing spiked stiletto heels (covers groin) if you’d rather not play with toys.

Ball Stretching

It’s no stretch of the imagination to say that this is the perfect punishment when it comes to a bit of ‘genitorment’. A ball stretcher gradually applies pressure to the scrotum pulling it downwards and away from the body. In addition, when attached it will stop those naughty, hairy space hoppers from doing a disappearing act until you’re done. Feeling extra mean, oh dominant one? Try tugging gently on the weights! Mwahahahahahaha!

Ball Busting

Ever heard the saying: ‘Dude, she’s a real ball buster!” Well, this gives an all new, literal meaning to the phrase! Ball busting, or ‘bb’ for short, refers to the act of kicking, kneeing or punching a man in the testicles. Unfortunately (well, fortunately, I guess), in this sort of activity the balls are not made of steel, so it can hurt kind of a lot. This particular form of CBT originates in Japan, where it is referred to as Tamakeri.

Although testicles are actually more resilient than you think, and you know what they say - “no pain, no gain”, just make sure you always follow safety. Be careful with those family jewels, they can’t be replaced!

Great Sexpectations - Porn VS Real Sex

Much like your love life rarely resembles a romance movie, your sex life is probably a far cry from what you see in the world of the sexually explicit. If that first sentence does not apply to you, you have no idea how lucky you are. For the rest of us, here are some of the most unlikely, unrealistic and sometimes laughable expectations we get from porn.

Long-Lasting and Orgasms For All…Every Time!

Hey, in real life quickies happen, and they can be great. Other times, you may keep the action going for hours. As long as your needs are being met, who needs a time frame? So, you don’t always climax, and that’s totally fine. You can still have awesome sex without an orgasm.

Real Sex Sounds

In porn there are really only two things you hear; bad dialogue and animalistic orgasms. What about all the awkward smacking, sucking, and slapping noises that go on? Sure they’re a little bit off-putting at first, but hey it’s all part of the game, right?

You’re Perfectly Groomed Below the Belt Before Every Single Hookup

Unless you’ve got a waxing specialist on standby, you’re probably not super-smooth all month long. Plus, we’re willing to bet you don’t let a few stray hairs stand in the way of a good time.

Missionary is Out. Gymnastics are In

Sure Ron Jeremy might be able to work that reverse spider monkey position for hours on end, but in the real world, awkward positions can result in painful cramping. Now we’re all for porn looking as pristine and perfect as possible, but can a guy get a little disclaimer explaining that drilling for oil while their girl is doing a handstand is going to make her neck and his back hurt for a while?

Acrobats Rarely Exist Outside of a Circus Tent

Chances are, you’re not going to be hooking up with a lot of people who like getting freaky while hanging upside-down on a stripper pole in reality. Oddly enough, the porn world seems to be filled with men and women who don’t mind getting mauled in the kitchen sink or tossing a salad or two while bending backwards over a coffee table. As much as we might think it’s cool, that stuff is just uncomfortable. Kitchen table - absolutely! Back seat of a cramped car - sure why not! Face buried in carpet while hanging off the couch - not so much.

Sweat Isn’t as Cool in the Real World

Alright, so this one may be up for debate because many people are up for a passionate, sticky, sweaty romp, but somehow in porn it’s just always sexier. A porn actress glistens when a thin layer of perspiration and a lot of good lighting come together in harmony. But for the rest of us, if you focus on it, it’s just kind of gross.

Awkward Condom Situations

On the rare occasions that a male porn star is actually wearing a condom, it’d be nice to see him struggle with opening the wrapper some of the time, or maybe having a hard time putting it on — it just adds a touch of humanity.

Your Reactions are Always Oscar-Worthy in Bed

When something feels good, definitely let your partner know. But that doesn’t mean moaning so loud your neighbours hear it. Don’t feel the need to mimic the false or over-exaggerated enthusiasm instead of just your natural response—your partner will see right through it.

Every Guy is Blessed with a Pants Python

So this is why guys are so concerned about their penis sizes. In reality the average male penis size is about 5 inches long. Remember it is not about how big it is, it is how you use it that makes all the difference.

Everyone Wants to have a Threesome/Role Play/Dominate You/etc.

Just like you’re not into everything you see online, your bedmate isn’t either. So don’t assume they want to act out every fantasy listed in their browser history.

Remember, it’s fine to use porn to help spice things up—both solo and with a bedmate, but never forget that these X-rated clips aren’t the real deal. Real sex is horny, funny, emotional and..well…just better!

4 Bondage Tips For Beginners So You Will Rarely Need a Safe Word

Bondage is not just for the BDSM lovers out there, it’s for anyone who wants to add a bit of spice to their sexy time. Bondage may be a factor of BDSM but the belief that it is only used during this kind of setting is a misconception, however it can be a gentle introduction into the BDSM lifestyle. Here’s our guide to safety when considering beginner’s bondage.

In Charge or Under Control?

You need to discuss what you want out of bondage with your partner. Is domination your kind of thing and they want to surrender to you? Or perhaps you both like the thought of being tied up and taken advantage of, in which case you need to take turns? Where will your kinky play take place? The bedroom? The kitchen? Your back garden? What will you use for creating the knots? You need to prepare for everything, not only to make sure you get the most out of your kinky time but also to keep yourselves safe.

Safe is the New Sexy

Be particularly careful on deciding on where to have your fun. Tying someone up in a steamy shower could be fantastically erotic but their hands are no longer free to catch and balance themselves. Your kitchen floor could be a majorly horny place to get down to it but there’s the obvious array of sharp, heavy utensils, moving drawers and countless other dangerous items in your kitchen — well not just your kitchen but every room. Survey your prospective play area and safe-proof everything before having your fu, as one of you will be at a disadvantage when tied up and unable to react quickly to any mishap.

Silk Appeal

The material you use is best kept as something soft, flexible and easily accessible for starting out. You might want to go full on and buy a bunch of rope to hogtie your partner with, but you need to transition into it before you get to that stage. Something you have at home like a tie or stockings are perfect for beginners’ bondage as they’re forgiving on the skin and you already have them, so if you’re not keen on tying one another up after trying it, you haven’t wasted any money. Then, once you are both comfortable, you can move on to other materials such as ropes. Keep in mind that there’s going to be some back and forth movement, and with a tougher material like rope on skin that isn’t used to such treatment there could be injuries if you do not do things right. Also try not to use anything of value to tie them up just in case of an emergency where you need to cut their ties in a hurry.

Always Have a Safe Word

Bondage can be a very part of role playing. Always make sure that you and your partner have agreed on a safe word before playing. This must be something unusual that would not normally be said. So whether it is ‘Mugglewump’, ‘Marmite’ or ’Margaret Thatcher’, make sure you have it sorted

Bondage can be great fun, it gives extra sensation to the person tied up as their body is producing extra adrenaline as a natural response to being restrained. Even though they’ve chosen this, it’s what humans have evolved to do when suddenly not in control of their own bodies. So more adrenaline, more blood rushing to the genitals and erogenous areas leading to fantastic sex and higher intensity orgasms. Now that we’ve given you the science and the theory, it’s time to take the practical.

What Does Your Star Sign Say About You When it Comes to Sex?

Even if you read your weekly horoscope for fun, you might roll your eyes at the concept of astrological compatibility. But what if great sex is written in the stars, and "hey baby, what's your sign?" doesn't deserve its corny reputation?

If you're looking to achieve off-the-charts chemistry (aren't we all?) with a lover, it certainly can't hurt to consult the astrological charts. Discover your best bedroom chemistry with our guide to the stars and what takes them to cosmic climax.

Aries March 21 – April 19

The Ram is a take-charge kind of lover, self-confident to the extreme and loves to experiment. Be forewarned the Ram has an unquenchable thirst for sex and if you aren't able to keep up, it might become a sore spot.

Taurus April 20 – May 20

Taureans have a strong sex drive and love to touch and to be touched. The Bull is very self-assured as a lover, although they might be considered a little old-fashioned by some. Expect the Taurus to satisfy you, but don't expect anything too unconventional.

Gemini May 21 – June 21

The Twins are masters of seduction. Your Gemini lover will stimulate your mind and your body, and because of this sign's creativity, your Twin will never be boring between the sheets. The Twins will never fall into the rut of the same ol' thing over and over again, so you'll always be surprised!

Cancer June 22 – July 22

Many Crabs are somewhat submissive sexually and enjoy pleasing their lover with tenderness and soft, lingering touches. Don't be surprised if your Cancer lover offers you a back rub or massage as part of foreplay!

Leo July 23 – August 22

Leos are powerful in bed, and many are dominant by nature. They have amazing sexual energy and confidence and have the innate ability to lead even reluctant lovers into the throes of passion. The Lions are generous in bed, but they expects to get at least as much as he gives.

Virgo August 23 – September 22

Virgo is the "still water that runs deep." In other words, once you get underneath Virgo's calm surface, there's plenty of fiery passion underneath. They take very good care of their lovers in bed, showering them with their full attention.

Libra September 23 – October 22

Because of Libra's creativity , and fun-loving nature, a Libra lover will provide lots of sexual enjoyment to the right partner. Libras are very creative and enjoy playing out their sexual fantasies, including role playing.

Scorpio October 23 – November 21

Scorpios exude a powerful animal magnetism and a special sex appeal that's practically impossible to ignore. They have boundless libido, and a Scorpio lover can take you to heights of passion you never thought possible.

Sagittarius November 22 – December 21

Archers are imaginative in bed and like to be sure their lover is enjoying themself. It's often difficult to get a Sagittarius to commit to a long-term relationship, but for sexual fulfillment, this sign is hard to beat.

Capricorn December 22 – January 19

For the Goat, love and sex often go hand in hand. If a Capricorn cares for you, you will have no trouble arousing them to passionate sex. If you seek a kind, steady lover, Capricorn is for you.

Aquarius January 20 – February 18

Aquarians are all about physical passion, with or without an actual relationship. They enjoy experimenting in bed and are often considered "kinky." If you're open to trying new things in the bedroom, you won't be disappointed with the Water Bearer.

Pisces February 19 – March 20

Pisceans are very easygoing and receptive to their lover's advances, so if you want to be the aggressor, Pisces might be just the fish you're angling for!

Becoming a MILF Hunter

Are you on the prowl for an older, more experienced lady who knows what she wants and how to get it? In case you’re new to MILF hunting or simply need a refresher, here’s our guide to wooing your fiery cougar into bed!

Be Good To Her and She’ll Be Good to You

Remember that mature ladies are majestic with much respect for themselves, so treat them with that same level of appreciation and don’t forget for a second that she has those additional years of practice in pulling - she’s much better at it than you are. So if you act like anything less than a gentleman in the way you speak to and treat her, don’t be surprised when you’re kicked to the curb and she goes on to find someone who really does behave like they should toward her.

MILF Locations

Where to find a filthy MILF that will fulfil all your darkest pleasures? There are so many places, from the gym getting their beautiful figures in shape, the local park mingling with other MILFs, to the pub scouting out potential younger lays across the bar. Want to be one of those hot, less experienced men that they bed after eye-fucking across the room? We bet you do!

Please Her in more Ways than One

You’ve bagged your sexy older vixen and you’re in between the sheets, now you need to show your MILF what a raging testosterone-filled bull you are. Don’t hold back, your mature woman doesn’t want a young boy, she wants an enthused, alpha male who knows how to caress her oh so subtly yet bring her to the point of climatic, Earth-shaking pleasure whilst getting what he desires from her also. She wants this man to show her things she’s never seen and please her in ways she’d never imagined. So think outside the box when with your MILF, missionary all night most likely wont cut her mustard!

So remember to exude confidence, allure, respect and display a little awe that’s due for the wondrous females that are mature women. Your older woman will be intriguing not just in the bedroom but in general thanks to her extensive life experience, she will show you things you could only have ever dreamt up from the most sensual pornography and leave the most erotic memories etched in your mind for the rest of your life.

9 Epic Sex Fails That Made Love Hurt - Literally!

We all get used to the occasional bruise, scratch and cramp when it comes to having a good time in the bedroom. They say ‘Love Hurts,’ but sometimes sex lands lovers in A&E. Prepare to cringe and crack up after reading these true, naughty stories. Rubber ball stuck where the sun doesn’t shine anyone? Behold, the wildest sex fails we’ve ever heard.

Wall-Breaking Sex

When a 440lb virgin decided to take things to the next level with his 110lb lover, things tragically ended with him accidentally driving her head right through the room’s sheet-rock wall. The two went to hospital where the female was ultimately told by doctors that she had a concussion. The couple stayed together for a few months after the incident, but have since called it quits.

Safety First

A doctor in india was mystified when a female patient complained of having a serious cough, runny nose and fever for over half a year. She’d been put on various medications, but nothing seemed to help. So, fearing the worst, they ran some hospital tests…and realised she had a condom lodged inside her lungs. Apparently, she’d inhaled it during an ‘act of love’, without actually realising it (how does this happen?). But hey, at least she was having safe sex.

Heart-Stoppingly Good Sex

A young guy and his girlfriend decided to get it on in his grandmother’s basement while she was out of the house. They grabbed a tube of what they thought was lubricant from her well-stocked medicine cabinet. Unfortunately it was nitroglycerin paste, a heart drug that can cause a potentially fatal drop in blood pressure. When Grandma came home, she found the couple unconscious, buck naked, and lying in a rather saucy position. An ambulance was called and they eventually came to after being given oxygen and fluids. So all ended well…other than the look on Grandma’s face!

A Hard Act to Follow

A 20-year-old man - reportedly healthy and sober at the time - was hospitalised with complaints of severe rectal discomfort. A digital examination revealed a hard, stone-like mass, and the patient soon admitted he’d been fooling around with his partner and they had decided to pour concrete mix into…erm…you know where. The concrete was removed and the patient discharged the following day. Moral of the story: don’t…just don’t —well, unless you require a statue for your mantelpiece that will be a feature of intrigue and horror for future house guests.

Not-So-Good Vibrations

Oh those naughty knickers hey! A 33-year-old Welsh housewife was reported to have passed out at a supermarket. The reason? She had been ‘overcome’ by the vibrations of a pair of Naughty Passion Pants she was wearing underneath her clothes. she collapsed against some shelves and banged her head. As she lay there, spectators reportedly could hear the undies still buzzing.

Just…Ouch!

Men with slightly small appendages — just be grateful for what you’ve got. One Malaysian man thought his wasn’t big enough and decided to take drastic action. His solution? Stick his dingaling into a welding nut and try to stretch it. Sadly, he got stuck, Forcing doctors to remove the top layer of penis skin to free it. Yikes!

Definitely the Wrong Tool for the Job

A couple in America decided to ramp up their vibrator by attaching it to a power tool. An electric saw in fact! Ooooooooh nooooooo! The woman had to be rushed to hospital after it cut clean through the plastic toy. Thankfully she made a full recovery and would be unlikely to try that again.

Gotta Have Some Hot Stuff

Ever heard about drunken idiots snorting chilli? We definitely do not recommend doing this, but apparently the burning sensation is painfully intense due to the sensitive skin on the inside of your nose, called mucous membrane, which also lines your lips, ears and…wait for it… the genitals! Well one couple inadvertently spiced up their sex life when the man came home from a night out eating spicy, hot food and then engaged in saucy bedroom antics with his lady, only to accidentally burn her sensitive parts with his tongue.

What’s Up Doc?

A young couple rushed to hospital with this story: During sex the woman had grabbed a medium-sized rubber ball and inserted it into her man’s back door. The ball had become lodged so high in his rectum that they couldn’t get it out. It turned out that the doctor could not either! The doctor paged a surgeon, but whilst waiting for him to arrive, the man began coughing. The ball came flying out of his butt with enough velocity to ping around the room and hit the surgeon right in the forehead just as he came through the door. (I don’t know about anyone else but this one totally cracks me up!)

Most sexual activity ‘comes’ with the risk of something going wrong. Yep, you read that right, there is no such thing as having perfect sex. Just don’t go to these extremes hey folks. Have you ever had a sex-related injury? Tell us about it in the comments.